The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Wednesday, 28 March 2012

Ian Duncan Smith Accused Of Human Rights Violations.

Ian Duncan Smith, arguably the most evil man in British politics since the last Ice Age, has been slammed by Parliament’s Joint Committee on Human Rights for a deliberately botched consultation over changes to disability benefits in which public concerns were completely ignored. Under normal circumstances this would be bad enough, but the death toll that is the result of his attack on the weak and vulnerable still continues to rise. We asked the Minister for Killing the Disabled for his view; "I don't accept that ignoring the impact assessment that has resulted in 150 deaths has anything to do with human rights. Useless people such as criples and the terminally ill are not really human and killing them is a duty rather than a crime. The main thing is that George Osborne was able to give tax breaks to those wealthy mates of ours who bankroll our criminal activities because of the money we've saved by killing these impediments to growth. The people of this country will thank me when we can do away with all those disabled parking spaces at the supermarket and we've gotten rid of all those cripled family members who annoy and embarass them. Did I mention that I'm a Christian and that, therefore, anything I do is sanctioned by God? I would also like to point out that God is a Tory and doesn't like crippled hangers-on or rich people paying taxes."

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