The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Saturday 5 November 2011

Tories Not Interested in Democracy.


A cross-party committee has voiced its concern that changes to voter's registration rules might lead to 30% of voters in inner city areas not bothering to register. "We understand the committee's concern," a Tory spokesperson told our reporter, "but, to be honest, we couldn't give a monkey's as to what they think. We are completely aware that the changes might lead to less people voting Labour, but that's the whole point isn't it? Votes are becoming a really dangerous thing and are threatening to actually lead to change so we've decided to begin the process of abolishing them. We believe that our democracy is strong enough to get along without poor people being given their say. I would hasten to add, however, that we have no plans to stop the best sort of people from voting - as long as they continue to vote for us that is."

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