The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Sunday 20 November 2011

Democracy Flares Up Again - In Ireland.


In a disturbing development for the banking community democracy has once more reared its ugly head in Ireland. "New Beginning," a protest movement against corporate greed, has called for a mortgage strike to prevent banks from repossessing properties. Prompted by the flat refusal by the banks to pass on cuts in the base rate by the European Central Bank, the organisers have described the mortgage strike as a "nuclear weapon" in their struggle against ugratful bankers who were given £70 billion of taxpayers money to bail them out. We asked a spokesperson for the Irish banks for their reaction; "This is potentially very dangerous and may well lead to disaster - or at least it will do if we can arrange it in time. Every time you think that democracy has been successfully stamped out in one place it springs up somewhere else. We've lodged a protest with Goldman Sachs, the successors to the United Nations, and fully expect them to blackmail the Irish government into arresting these financial terrorists as soon as possible." We asked the Irish government what they might do to help the situation; "I'm afraid we haven't had our instructions from the IMF yet so we can't comment. As an emergency measure we've drafted legislation to prevent the homeless from erecting tents in full view of any TV cameras and we're confident that this should be enough."

No comments:

Post a Comment