Tories Receive Millions in "Donations" From Property Developers.

In a completely predictable development today it has been revealed that the Tories have received millions of pounds from property developers in the form of "donations". Asked to comment a Tory spokesperson told "The News in Shorts"; "We don't want people to believe that this was in any way bribery and corruption - it is, but we don't want anyone to believe it." Asked for further details about the Conservative Property Forum made up of elite property developers who meet with government members during "breakfast meetings" to discuss property matters, the Tory spokesperson said; "There is nothing sinister about these meetings, they are completely open and above board. Property developers tell us what they want, promise to hand over large amounts of cash to us and we change the law to suit them. See, nothing wrong with that is there?" Pressed further, the spokesperson also admitted that developers were charged £2,500 to see government members. "Mere pocket money. You can't expect important people like us to see someone unless they're willing to pay - our time is very valuable. David Cameron has often been interrupted when packing his suitcase and Eric Pickles has often been called upon when he's about to tuck into a plate of doughnuts - it's all very inconvenient at times."