The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Friday 23 September 2011

Conservative MP Supports the Judicial Execution of Innocent People.

Britain's most popular panel show, "Question Time," has demonstrated once again tonight why it retains this position in the ratings - Ian Hislop. While the political establishment furnished the usual set of placemen and nonentities, Ian Hislop proved once again that Britain can still produce people with some sense of humanity. Priti Patel, Tory MP for Witham, on the other hand proved conclusively that this is not always the case. Ending every comment she made with the phrase "I really do," she managed to be the only person on the panel to be booed by the audience for her support of killing innocent people. Capital punishment, she suggested, acts as a deterrent even if the person executed is actually innocent. Texas, as Ian Hislop pointed out, seems to be an exception to this since, despite killing people right and left, it's death row continues to be well populated. Floored by the logic of this response Patel then fell back on the "vengeance" argument, one that Tories often seem to invoke when dealing with the economy.

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