Property Developers Are Tories New "Best Friends"

In a pincer attack on the rest of us the Tories have joined forces with property developers in order to steal as much money from us as possible. As Francis Maude described the National Trust as "bollocks" David Cameron is set to extend the "right to buy" in council properties. "It's my masterplan," the part-time Prime Minister told our reporter, "to get the economy out of intensive care by expanding the property market and the "buy-to-rent" industry." Asked if it wasn't subprime lending in the property market that wrecked the economy last time he replied; "And your point?" Our property market expert told the editor; "The reasons behind this are quite simple. Flog off much of Britain's green belt to property developers and you increase the net value of the country, even if the property developers simply put it to one side or rent it back to farmers. At the same time extending the "right to buy" amongst council house tennants practically guarantees that they'll end up in the "buy-to-rent" industry. Then rents will go through the roof generating huge profits, some of which will be passed on to the Tories as "donations." It's a wonderful scam - sorry government policy. We'd better get ready for a new round of bailing out the bankers when this all goes horribly wrong."