Finding it difficult to hide the essential nastiness, incompetence and economic idiocy of the Tory party, David Cameron has dusted off his non-existant EU "veto" once again in order to please the insane right of his party. "If the other 26 nations of the EU negoatiate a budget that tries to make bankers pay for their own mistakes I will take my bat and ball home," he told the BBC today. "I would fully expect the rest of the EU to surrender immediately and do exactly what I tell them. And even if they don't I can pretend that they have and boast in parliament how I brought Johnnie Foreigner to heel. Fortunately the English Channel - note the name I might add - means that no real news ever comes out of Europe and virtually no one in Britain can either speak or understand the barbaric languages they have there." We asked an EU spokesperson for his reaction to this worrying threat; "Britain? Where's that then? Oh, you mean that little island off the coast of France that no one takes any notice of. We couldn't give a toss as to whether Cameron signs the budget or not - though how a refusal to join the rest of Europe constitutes a veto is beyond me. I suppose Cameron thinks that European bankers and various millionaires will immediately up stakes and move to London. I can't imagine why they'd want to - you can't even get a good glass of wine there. I don't see your typical Italian banker swopping Mama's home made pasta for a tin of Heinz spaghetti or a French millionaire abandoning the grapes of the Loire for England's fizzy plonk do you? Britain's cafe society isn't too attractive when you can only enjoy it sheltering under an umbrella."
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