Cameron And May Both Accused Of Being Totally Stupid.

Controversy surrounded the Tory party conference as it became evident that both David Cameron and Theresa May have been completely stupid at the same time. In the first instance David Cameron has had to remove his reference to households paying off their credit cards since this threatned to dampen consumer demand and make the recession even worse. In the second instance Theresa May left the stage after a keynote speech to the strains of "Primal Scream" singing lyrics such as "Dealers keep dealin', thieves keep thievin'" and "Get your rocks off, get your rocks off." A party spokesman told us; "We have warned keynote speakers not to vie with each other to be the most stupid, but politicians are naturally competative. We had the same problem with Ian Duncan Smith and William Hague yesterday, but fortunately for both of them the light glinting off their heads distracted attention from the twaddle they were mouthing." We asked a communication expert, Dr.Garibaldi Megaphoni, for his views. "We expect politicians to lie as a matter of course, so Theresa May's ridiculous story about the illegal immigrant and the cat was par for the course. But when they become incoherent, careless and just plain supid, they diminish the offices they hold. Ian Duncan Smith's claim that the Tories were now the "party of the poor" was a bit iffy since it suggested that they were so because they'd created so many poor people. Now that was, frankly, bloody stupid but at least it wasn't a lie. On the other hand Michael Gove's claim today that the Tories "are on the side of poor" is both a lie and stupid."