Amish-on-Amish Crime Increases in America.

Never mind the occupation of Wall Street by protestors at the lack of real democracy in the United States, the story that has grabbed the headlines in Britain is a sudden and unexpected crime wave amongst the Amish community in Ohio. The Amish are a religious group of German origin that eschew the use of all modern inventions including their brains. What has people gossiping is an outbreak of feloneous hair and beard cutting (the Amish, including the women, don't shave). "We believe this reflects the development of a peculiar sect amongst the Amish," a law enforcement officer from Ohio told us. "Though how you can tell the difference is a mystery to me. The trouble seems to centre on just 18 families some members of which appear to be their own grandfathers. I'm not even sure if forcibly shaving someone's beard is actually a criminal offence - especially if the beard belongs to your sister-in-law."