George Osborne, rumoured to be Chancellor of the Exchequer, has today announced a £1 billion stimulus package to the economy. Sporting his new Keynsian image he was heard to say "Does my wallet look big in this?" We asked a Tory insider for the party's views; "Man's gone completely orf his head don't you know. What did a professional economist like Keynes know compared to the blessed Margaret Thatcher? It will all end in tears." Unable to get any sense out of the Tory party we turned to our own economic analyst Dr.Cassandra Pythia for her view; "It seems the plan is to throw the money at capital projects that will benefit utility companies and telecommunications. It might create a couple of thousand jobs across the country, including 500 jobs for the ex-servicemen they threw out of work in the first place, which will enable the Tories to claim that "private enterprise" is coming to the rescue after all. But that's about it. Considering the billions that this recession has cost the country so far and the billions poured into the pockets of bankers, £1 billion is pocket change. The other side of the coin is the loss of yet more worker's rights and even less job security in an economy that will still be tanking."
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