In a leaked document it has been revealed that the Tories are "considering" removing the last vestige of workers rights in Britain by denying them legal redress for wrongful dismissal. We asked a leading Tory for his comments; "Disgraceful isn't it? Someone leaking a private document to the press. But that aside, we think that this is the only way for Britain to recover from the present recession. It's a well known fact that denying democratic rights to workers is a sure fire way to improve the economy. Along with contracts that are not worth the paper they're written on, this will make all the difference to morale in the business community. We have been heartened by the puny response to our letting the bankers off the hook and too the public belief that all protest is the work of criminals and anarchists." Meanwhile there has been a different response from the legal profession who have just woken up to the fact that this will remove their access to a very lucrative gravy train; "This is a bleeding disaster," one distressed lawyer told our reporter. "We were making a mint out of all the illegal sackings that companies have been trying to pull and, with the present recession, we looking forward to a bonanza. Now business is going to be allowed to get away with murder and we're left with bugger all except divorce, PPI scams and ambulance chasing. Still, it does mean I can sack half my workforce and make the rest work like dogs if they want to keep their jobs. Oh well, every cloud has a silver lining."
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