The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Tuesday, 14 August 2012

So, What Are The Police For Again?

G4S, the same people who failed utterly to meet their cotractural obligations to provide security at the Olympics, has begun to advertise for staff to help the police investigate crime. Of course one of the main reasons behind this development is the Tory desire to drive down wages so they and their mates can steal even more public money. So we can all soon look forward to such crimes as burglary being "investigated" by undertrained staff on the minimum wage. Criminals must be rubbing their hands together with glee - especially those in the Tory party. But all this rather begs the question as to what the police force will be used for. Today this reporter was brought face to face with the answer in no uncertain terms when he was issued with a speeding ticket. They will be redeployed to ambush essentially innocent motorists simply trying to get to work. There is a good economic argument for this. Criminals are difficult to apprehend and, even when they are, prove to be a costly luxury what with the spiralling costs of imprisonment. They tend not to pay fines either. Ordinary motorists, on the other hand, are easy to trace, tend to pay their fines and cost little to apprehend. It's a simple exercise in cost-effectiveness and there's nothing the Tories like more than squeezing the public for a few extra quid so they can feather their own nests. Now we can all relish the sight of thousands of burglars roving around the country stealing whatever they can get their hands on pursued by teenagers on "work experience" on the one hand and thousands of policemen and women roving around the country in order to steal money from the public on the other. It will be a Tory paradise and hell on earth for the rest of us.

1 comment:

  1. Haha, absolutely right. Why make it hard when you can just send a summons for cash for a speeding offence or get a computer message saying 'Mr Tax payer failed to declare SORN get him'. Now we have 'Failure to Insure' added to the list the computers monitors us for.
    What will the next one added to the list to criminalise us ?