The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Tuesday 13 November 2012

Cameron On The Side Of The Banks.

In Iceland corrupt bankers and politicians were arrested and the huge debts that they had imposed on the country in order to line their own pockets were repudiated. As a result Iceland's economy not only recovered faster than any other economy in Europe, it is now growing at a faster pace than either the United States or Europe. Meanwhile in Britain David Cameron has used the occasion of the Mansion House Speech, by tradition a speech dedicated to foreign policy, to make it clear that he not only supports the banks but is wholly on their side. Warning that "trashing" the banks risks "trashing" the country, he laid out the fatcat view of the world. Essentially while the banks "trashed" the entire world economy because they were greedy, stupid and completely out of control, David Cameron thinks it is time for us to forgive and forget. "Go back to sleep" he urges us, "the economy is safe in our hands. We've instituted new controls over the banks whereby errant bankers will be severely punished if they break the rules - that is exiled to a sunny climate with only a few million quid to live on. Other than that it's business as usual. Just pay your taxes, accept the cuts to your standard of living and services, pay through the nose for petrol, gas and electricity and let the banks do what they want and everything will be tickety-boo." Referring to his recent jaunt around the world to sell arms to various nasty regimes who like to kill their own people if they disagree with them, the Prime Minister assured the country; "Don't worry about things like that. Every country has the right to kill, maim and intimidate if it likes and the arms trade is completely justified if the businesses involved are privatised. There is nothing wrong with profits, especially if some of it is diverted to the Tory party through "donations"".

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