The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Sunday, 10 November 2013

Full Steam Ahead On Planet Tory.

Every Prime Minister has a good week now and again and this has certainly been one of David Cameron's best so far. His programme to demolish three-bedroomed houses in Britain is going well as the bedroom tax makes them unaffordable for most ordinary people, the pay of so-called "super managers" in the NHS has shot up despite a 1% pay freeze for everyone else and Tory MP Nadhim Zahawi has agreed to pay back the money he claimed for heating his stables. All this was marred only by Jeremy Paxman finally noticing what many of us have known all along - that David Cameron is a really nasty piece of work. Paxman's epiphany came about because of Cameron's plan to celebrate the outbreak of World War I. "What kind of idiot would celebrate the outbreak of a war that saw the slaughter of an entire generation of young British men?" Paxman asked. The News in Shorts might understand celebrating the 100th anniversary of the end of World War I which, of course, would occur in 2018. And that's the problem as far as Cameron is concerned. By 2018, if there's any justice, Cameron will be out of office and be languishing on the Tory back benches listening to the latest swivel-eyed loon to lead the Tory party in opposition. He needs a celebration in the run up to the general election of 2015 that will create a "feel good factor" and, hopefully, give him a majority in Parliament so he can carry on persecuting the unemployed, sick and disabled. Unfortunately the only one he can find is the one that celebrates the mass murder that occurred after August 1914 during which people like him shoved people like us "over the top" to die in our millions in no-mans land. Enter the Tory spin doctors determined to make a calamity for this country into a jamboree for those right-wingers who think that the wholesale slaughter or working-class people is a really, really good idea and an excuse for "a jolly good party." So is Cameron really an idiot? No, just another cold and calculating leader of the nasty party determined, if he gets the opportunity, to be even nastier after the general election in 2015.

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