The Political Vacuum.

So where is everyone? Since the EU referendum the Tory party, both leavers and remainers, have literally gone to earth and cannot be found with radar. Where is the leadership? Where are David Cameron and George Osborne? Where are Boris Johnson and Michael Gove? Nigel Farage is still in evidence trying to hide the fact that two years ago he was demanding that if the referendum was too close, 52% to 48% say, and he was on the losing side then another referendum should be held. Perhaps they hope that the so-called coup against Jeremy Corbyn, a story that the right-wing press is clinging to with desperation, might deflect attention from the utter mess the Tory party has left the country in. Then there is the elephant in the room. The UK is a representative democracy and not a direct democracy. Referendums are advisory only and have no binding legal force. Parliament is sovereign and it can overturn the utter folly of the UK leaving the EU. But for that we need leadership and a Parliament with a spine instead of a Parliament with nothing more than MP's addicted to filling their pockets with expenses and hiding their money in offshore accounts. The Leave campaign has now been exposed as a catalogue of lies, evasions and deceptions. There will be no extra money for the NHS, immigration will not be curbed and the free movement of people across Europe is to be retained. Nothing they promised will come about, so why should these snakeoil salesmen we allowed to reap the benefits of their confidence trick?

Yet Another Bad Hand For Britain.

Cameron has reshuffled his cabinet and what is the result? Gove, after a disastrous four years in education, has been moved from pouting at and bullying teachers to pouting at and bullying Tory backbenchers. While David Cameron described his petulant colleague as "a heavy-hitter" his real motive seems to lie in ditching an electoral liability who has managed to drive teachers into industrial action, entire schools into the hands of right-wing dingbats and religious fundamentalists and parents to the point of despair. To redress the Tory image of a bunch of Etonian toffs completely out of touch with the rest of the country, Cameron has beefed up the number of females around the cabinet table - replacing several insane male right-wing ideologues with an equal number of insane female right-wing ideologues. Esther McVey has been promoted from bad-mouthing poor people on behalf of Iain Duncan Smith in parliament to bad-mouthing poor people in the cabinet where IDS needs all the support he can get after his total failure to starve the poor into submission. Indeed Cameron's failure to move IDS somewhere where he can't inflict any more harm on vulnerable people or cost the country even more money is the real story of the cabinet reshuffle and tells us everything we need to know about the course of any future Tory government after 2015. Vicious and incompetent at the same time, IDS is what modern Toryism is all about. Forget the idea that Cameron's cabinet is now more Euro-sceptic - that's simply window dressing to recapture the swivel-eyed loons who have deserted to UKIP - what this reshuffle really tells us is that, after 2015, we can only expect more of the same. More poverty, more austerity, more social division and more disdain of ordinary people from a party who see themselves as somehow superior instead of the greedy scroungers they actually are.

Abuse: Establishment Cover Up Or Establishment Cover Up?

We are used to politicians legally dodging their tax liabilities and "accidentally" claiming too much on their expenses. We've even become used to politicians perverting the course of justice and then returning to government after being "re-habilitated." The disproportionate number of MP's and Lords with criminal records is no longer shocking, though it should be. Nor are we any longer amazed when a so-called celebrity is shown to have feet of clay and to have been hiding from us all a darker side. But what is about to crash into the headlines, the widespread abuse of power by politicians in the 1980's, threatens to rock our democracy to its very foundations. Should we be so shocked however? It is clear from the cases involving Jimmy Saville, Rolf Harris, the miner's strikes and Hillsborough that there was something very wrong about the 1980's. Perhaps Lord Tebbitt summed it all up for us when he revealed on TV that a cover up was not unlikely and that, at that time, such things were routine. It was a different time with different attitudes he blithely informed us as if that makes it all OK. The truth is that, apart from the attitudes of the political elite, it wasn't different in the 1980's. I was a young man then and, if sexual freedom was taken for granted, rape, sexual abuse and child molestation were not. It was a matter of knowing right from wrong. Sex, even then, was a mutually consensual activity and children under 18 were strictly off limits. What is being revealed by all of this is that the abuse of power in the 1980's was not only widespread but was considered normal. The 1980's were not what many of us believed they were and now stand revealed as a house of cards erected upon rotten foundations. Worse yet we now find that the establishment cover up continued well after the 1980's and even up to the present day. Today the Labour MP Simon Danczuk has revealed in the Mail Online that he has been pressurised by a Tory Minister to keep quiet about child abuse by politicians, while documents are now known to have conveniently disappeared. Meanwhile Michael Gove is desperately trying to tell us that this was all in the past and we should now concentrate on the future instead of raking over old coals. The Tory party is heavily implicated in all this, although it should be noted that they don't stand completely alone. But one thing is now becoming crystal clear at that is that Tory hegemony of power between 1979 and 1997 was a period in which the abuse of power lay at the very heart of government and, like now, formed a cornerstone of Tory philosophy.

What Does Cameron Mean By British Values?

In the wake of the "Trojan Horse" school scare in Birmingham David Cameron has said that he wants "British Values" to be part of the curriculum. The problem, however, is what "values" Cameron wants taught. He heads a government that persecutes the unemployed, the sick and the disabled, a government that shows no concern over the housing crisis, ignores environmental concerns, favours tax cuts for the rich while the wages of ordinary people continue to shrink and takes no action while utility companies steal what little money we do have. Apparently then the "values" that Cameron favours are greed, selfishness, arrogance and a complete disregard for the plight of others. The truth is that Cameron and his fellow Tory crooks have no values and certainly not any that any of us would want taught in our schools. Meanwhile with Gove in charge of education our schools are being turned over to various corporate sharks, religious maniacs and right-wing dingbats. It also begs the question why, in Britain, we still allow superstitious mumbo-jumbo to be taught in our schools in the first place? Schools are for education not to indulge the irrational belief systems of those who want to use religious observance for their own perverted ends. One thing for sure is that no one in the government has any interest in encouraging critical or original thinking. What they want is a straightjacket designed to shackle young minds to an unthinking acceptance of the status quo - to be good, obedient Tory voters and to accept their place in the great scheme of things without question. While the Tories are busily engaged in turning our schools into machines for the dissemination of Tory propaganda what right do they have to complain when some other control freaks want to do the same?

Lib Dems Suddenly Horrified By Tories.

With the next general election only a year away the Lib Dems are now busy trying to distance themselves from some of the nasty things they've done over the last four years. After total silence on the subject, the Lib Dem president Tim Farron, has suddenly discovered that the Bedroom Tax has caused "huge social problems". "The onslaught of divisive rhetoric that demonises the poor can never help us to create a fairer society," he warned an all-party committee of MPs as if he's just woken up after spending the last four years in a coma. The electorate, he warned, "will take the side of anyone who has the backbone to stand up for them" - appealing to the Lib Dems to look everywhere for theirs. Meanwhile the Tories, also keen to pretend that they have been in opposition since 2010, are talking in terms of a brighter future with George Osborne promising full employment and Michael Gove promising to "abolish illiteracy and innumeracy". All of which rather begs the question; "What the f**k have you been doing for the last four years?" The answer is that the Coalition has been busy transferring money from the poor to their rich mates in return for bribes, persecuting the unemployed, disabled and sick, wrecking the economy, softening up the NHS for privatisation, stealing national assets to line their own pockets and padding their expense accounts. In political terms at least both the Tories and Lib Dems have blood on their hands and stuffing them in their pockets and whistling while staring at the sky cannot make them clean again. The Tories are evil and nothing they can say or do will ever change that, but the Lib Dems have happily collaborated with them in return for the illusion, if not the substance, of power - happy to be the Tories political rent boys.

Cameron Undecided As To How Rich Britain Actually Is.

David Cameron donned a plastic yellow hat and a high visibility jacket today so he could threaten Scotland from a North Sea oil rig 60 miles offshore and still be seen. His message was loud and clear - revenue from the North Sea would be in danger without "the broad shoulders of the world's tenth largest economy" to support it. For those of you who don't work in London's financial centre, he was describing Great Britain. Why "the broad shoulders of the world's tenth largest economy" can't support its own children and give them enough to eat, prevent its pensioners from freezing to death each winter or pay a living wage to large swathes of the population remains a mystery - and will continue to do so as long as Cameron is warming his backside in No.10. George Osborne, meanwhile, was grinning like an idiot as he told reporters that Britain had "an open chequebook" as far as supporting the new Ukrainian government was concerned. Not that they were asking you understand, but George never passes up an opportunity to boast about his "miracle economic recovery" and how rich we are - unless you happen to be unfortunate enough to be British that is. Worried that their conflicting message might be confusing voters Iain Martin writing in the "Telegraph" told the Tory party today that Cameron needs Michael Gove to be unleashed against Ed Milliband. So far advice for saving the Tories from electoral disaster has swung between Nigel Farage as a replacement for Nick Clegg, Iain Duncan Smith being canonised for his services to the poor and Norman Tebbit being disinturned and shocked back into life. But Ed Milliband being savaged by an intellectually challenged Pob lookalike? Surely they can't be serious?

Tories Plunder Education.

Michael Gove, the man who thinks that the slaughter of millions during Word War I was "a jolly good idea", has stolen up to £15 billion of public assets in the form of 3,000 schools and given them away to Tory party "donors". These schools are being subsidised by the taxpayer even as the new owners award themselves huge pay awards of up to £300,000 per year. These same owners are also awarding juicy and expensive contracts to the other companies they own stealing yet more public money while padding out their expense accounts with such items as 1st class rail travel and junkets to prestigious holiday destinations for "conferences." Worse yet many of them are transferring their profits to tax havens and avoiding paying any tax on the proceeds of their criminal activities. This is what the Tories mean by "private sector efficiency" as a bunch of crooks, conmen and spivs efficiently transfer taxpayers money into their own pockets, the whole process overseen by an equally criminal bunch of politicians gratefully pocketing "donations". As with all "privatisations" where publicly owned assets are given away to Tory corporate sharks who receive taxpayers money and then return some of that money as "donations", this is nothing more than money laundering on a staggering scale. Meanwhile George Osborne has splashed out £10,000 more in taxpayers money to Royal Academy of Dramatic Art (Rada) for acting lessons in order to boost his performance in Parliament and in the television studios. The official explanation for this is that Osborne is trying to improve his "communication skills" - in other words he is using taxpayers money to make his lies more believable. The Tory party has now morphed from a political party into a gang of confidence tricksters, stealing public money while distracting the rest of us with spurious tales about the need for austerity. They have taken greed and selfishness to new levels and are now plunging headlong into outright criminal activity.

Gove Applauds The Slaughter Of World War I

Michael Gove, the moron that Cameron put in charge of education, has made an extraordinary attack on the TV programme "Blackadder Goes Forth" telling the BBC that it was a scurrilous left-wing attack on a glorious period of British history. The Battle of the Somme, which saw 60,000 British casualties on the first day of the attack, has been "distorted" according to Gove and was actually the "precursor to victory" in 1918. The fact that the idiot Generals sitting safely behind the lines ordered the attack to continue for nearly six months and eventually clocked up an astounding 1,000,000 casualties seems to mean nothing to Gove. According to him the war was "a noble cause" and that historian agree with him, apparently falling over themselves to show that the elite that contemptuously allowed such slaughter were "conscious believers in king and country, committed to defending the western liberal order." Of course Gove is a completely insane and should not be allowed anywhere near of major government ministry, but his outburst is a very revealing snapshot of the Tory mind-set. To them ordinary people really are nothing more than counters in a game that only they should be allowed to play. They were content to see millions slaughtered during World War I as they sat safely at home counting their profits and they are content to do it again as we save the banks for them and protect their money. Gove would like us all to applaud the sacrifices made during the Great War, but he and his kind made no such sacrifices themselves and have no intention of making any sacrifices now either. To Gove and his mates in the criminal organisation known as the Tory party we are simply cannon fodder and should be grateful that they have accorded us even this lowly status. Scum the Tories always have been and scum they remain.

Nick Clegg And The Gentle Art Of Betrayal.

Nick Clegg is getting desperate these days as the general election in 2015 draws ever closer. Having utterly betrayed those who voted for him and his party, having betrayed every principle that his party is supposed to stand for, having betrayed the country, he is now positioning himself to betray his coalition partners. His attack on Michael Gove's education policy, after years of supporting it, is nothing more than opportunism - a feeble excuse to distance himself from the crimes of this government before he's called to account at the ballot box. Cameron has expressed his "surprise" at this sudden move but it is hard to understand why. Clegg is a weasel and is behaving as weasels do. Cameron should understand this since he is weasel too and, like Clegg, will countenance any measure that protects his wealth and privilege especially if someone else has to pay for it. Gove's policy in terms of independent academies was always bound to fail since it allowed education to be placed into the hands of any untrained swivel-eyed loon with an axe to grind. Clegg knew this but supported it anyway. The scandal over the Al-Madinah free school in Derby and others like it was bound to surface sooner or later and Clegg must have known this too. For his part Gove is only interested in lowering his tax bill and wouldn't give a damn about education even if the Taliban themselves were opening schools in the North of England. There is, however, a silver lining in this particular cloud since we can now all sit back and watch the fun as the pack of rats forming our present government turn on one another instead of us.

Tories Still Modernising Francis Maud Insists.

As the Tory party moves heaven and earth to force the country back into the mid-19th century, encouraging slum landlords, recreating workhouses for the poor and freeing capitalism to be as nasty and brutish as it can be, Francis Maud is insisting that the Tory party is still "modernising" itself. "Any party that ceases to modernise is a party that is going backwards," he told the Guardian today. "Modernisation is not something about realigning the Conservative party's principles," he added, "it is simply about making it current and making it contemporary." All of which begs the question, "Yes, and your point?" Meanwhile Cameron is hoping that a tax break for married couples, 66% of whom won't even qualify for it, will swing the election for him, Ian Duncan Smith is now talking about himself as the new William Beveridge even as he callously throws the poor, vulnerable and sick to the wolves and Michael Gove is hoping to recreate a two-tier education system in which only the children of the wealthy will benefit. If such 19th century thinking is what the Tories consider to be modern then one can only presume that they are still stuck in the 18th. But, if you really want to know what "modern" Toryism is all about then you have to look no further than Eric Pickles. Confronted by one of his own constituents who was abused as a child at the Kendall House care home and wanted to know why he and his party were ignoring the allegations, his reaction was to tell her to "adjust her medication." That is modern Toryism in a nutshell - callous, uncaring, selfish, self-serving and brutishly primitive.

Government Fading From Sight.

Alarm bells are ringing in Westminster as the Coalition Government becomes ever more invisible and fades into the background. The trend was first noticed when Michael Gove appeared on the BBC and all viewers could see was an empty suit. Then IDS became invisible as he tried to defend himself against accusations that he's a brainless idiot who lacks any moral compass whatsoever. Now David Cameron himself is beginning to fade away in the wake of his self-inflicted debacle over Syria. In every case the so-called Ministers involved have tried their level best to pretend that none of this has anything to do with them. All of them, after making complete arses of themselves because they are inept and utterly brainless, have sought to blame the last Labour government and pretend that the have no recollection of what they've been doing for the last three years. That is actually less surprising than it might first appear since their entire term in office has been spent fantasising about the nasty policies they would like to inflict on the British people for not voting for them. The latest piece of tomfoolery, concerning Cameron, Syria and his amateurish attempt to bounce Parliament into a war, seeks to blame his richly deserved beating on Tony Blair. The reason? Because Cameron tried to copy Blair and failed to pull it off because he's too dumb to walk and chew gum at the same time. All governments eventually discover what the limits of power are, but it is very rare that you find a government finding out what the limits of their collective intelligence is while also discovering how low the bar is set. Evil you can understand from a Tory regime, farce is a relatively new development within the party. The only good news in all this is that this collection of misfits and freaks would be far more dangerous if they actually possessed a brain. Thank God for private education!

Michael Gove Now Entirely Absent.

The BBC interviewed what appeared to be an empty suit today about the shortage of school places. Michael Gove could just be made out as he did his best to disappear into the background and deny that he is in any real sense the Education Secretary. "I can't remember where I've been for the last three years," he told the BBC. "There has been some speculation that I am the Education Secretary but, to be honest, I wouldn't know. Everything that has happened in my alleged Department in the last three years has been entirely the fault of Labour who, it would seem, are still secretly in charge of Education. I remember going to bed the night before the General Election but, after that, it's a complete blank. I know I've been taking swift action but I can't remember for the life of me what that action was. I blame the British people who should have voted Tory in the last election. If we'd won I would now be the real Education Secretary and, believe me, things would be a lot different. Examination results would be better, every child would have their own personal tutor, teachers would be better trained and all this would have been delivered at half the present cost. Its tragic that I was never afforded the opportunity to do something about this mysterious mess in the education sector. Still, at least with the new lobbying law going through Parliament today no one will be able to talk about it during the next General Election.

Tories Laundering Public Money.

So, the Tory story is that private enterprise is more "efficient" than the public sector and offers better "value for money" to taxpayers. Eager to prove this Michael Gove is busily engaged in privatising the education sector, promising that things will then miraculously improve. He's not wrong, though not in the way most people would wish. It turns out that one of the largest of the education trusts, the Academy Enterprise Trust, registered as a charity to avoid paying tax, has been stealing public money and diverting hundred's of thousands of pounds into the pockets of its trustees and executives. Instead of going to the schools to improve educational standards this money has found its way into the offshore bank accounts of a bunch of crooks appointed by Michael Gove. Why would any minister in his right mind allow this? Is it sheer coincidence that Gove has raked in over £500,000 in donations to the Tory party - more than any other Tory minister? The conclusion, that public money is being diverted into the hands of private enterprise who then pass some of this on to the Tory party in the form of "donations", seems inescapable. Privatisation, it would seem, is nothing less than a money laundering scheme for the Tory party. In the case of Gove this might be over-stating the case somewhat - though not by much - since much of the money given to him has come from a disgraced aluminium trader wanted by the FBI and a Mayfair nightclub owner. However, the vast majority of the donations he has gathered have come from so-called "supper clubs" in which money is handed over to the Tory party under a veil of secrecy by unknown individuals. If this is not simply organised crime then what is?

How The Tories Steal Your Money

Iain Duncan Smith, Britain's most successful scrounger, has announced that there are 1 million unemployed people in this country who refuse to work. A terrible indictment of lazy Britain it lacks only one small element - there is not a shred of evidence to support it. Then again the Tories never allow inconvenient facts to get in the way of a good alibi for their own greedy bone idleness. Meanwhile, while we are all lazing about and looking to get something for nothing, the Tories have cornered the market. Michael Gove, for instance, has cobbled together a bunch of his rich mates to work as "advisors" for the Ministry of Education and is paying them over £1,000 per day. Their job is to bully schools into becoming academies but get paid whether they succeed or not while, as an added incentive, they are paid through "personal companies" so they don't have to pay tax. Most of us might well be shocked at this obvious scam but not so our Chancellor, George Osborne, who has personally vetoed tax fraud investigations when they involve his favourite large corporations - that is any corporation that bankrolls the Tory party. Intent of recreating the financial merry-go-round that got us all into this mess in the first place, the Tories were hoist on their petard today however. Their plan to sell off branches of Lloyds Bank to the Co-Op fell apart when the buyers suddenly pulled out of the deal. Their reason? They feel that the Tories have made such a balls up of the economy that they simply can't take the risk - though they couldn't resist also citing the non-existant re-regualtion of the finance sector that the Tories are pretending to impose. Which just goes to show there really is no honour amongst thieves.

Goves Education Policy "Just One Damned Thing After Another."

It was perhaps inevitable that when choosing his cabinet Cameron would look for the most inappropriate people on offer in order to divert attention away from his own incompetence. Thus Iain Duncan Smith, a man who lied on his own CV and a religious madman without an ounce of Christian charity in his entire body, was put in charge of work and pensions, while Andrew Lansley, a greedy self-serving conman, was put in charge of the nation's health. The list of morons, madmen and swivel-eyed nutters in Cameron's government is almost endless, but his greatest triumph was in putting Michael Gove in charge of Education. This philistine has now unveiled his education policy and, as expected, it is a litany of Tory prejudice and yearning for a return to 19th century "values." History has been given special attention and, consulting with the likes of such "experts" as Lord Ashcroft who is to history what Saddam Hussein was to international harmony, he has come up with a curriculum fit only for the rubbish bin of history. Lessons are to concentrate on "Great Men" such as Clive of India and Benjamin Disraeli and British history is to be the central feature. Basically our children are to be fed a diet of jingoism so they can understand our special position in the world - a position that disappeared, along with the Empire, nearly a century ago. This, Gove tells us, will fit our children to the modern world - the Tory one in which China doesn't exist, disillusioned little brown people beg us to re-establish the Empire and the world awaits with baited breath for our next high-tech innovation. No wonder the Tory candidate for Eastleigh, Maria Hutchings, feels that state education is not "good enough" for her son. It isn't and it won't be good enough for our children either after Gove has finished with it.

Gove Makes His Bid For Party Leadership.

Michael Gove has laid out his qualifications as the next leader of the Tory party today. Having reversed every educational step forward for the last 150 years, Gove has now made the one indespensible move that is absolutely necessary to be a leader of the party - he has made a humilating u-turn on the most fundamental aspect of his policy. Forced into recognising that he no chance whatsoever of achieving his ambition of creating a school qualification reserved only for rich kids, he has no choice but to act as if he's the Education Secretary instead. We asked a senior Tory spokesman for his view; "Michael Gove has demonstrated that he has what it takes to be the next leader of our party. He's not only dismally stupid, he also has the skin of a rhino and is entirely out of touch with 99.9% of the population. We had high hopes for George Osborne, who is equally as well qualified to be leader, but we were quickly disabused when it emerged that his u-turns were ill-considered and he has failed to bankrupt the country quickly enough. His reputation was irrecoverably wrecked when he failed to tax pasties and lost a valuable opportunity to starve the peasants. Gove's ambition for all school lessons to be taught in Latin is revolutionary and leaves poor old George's ambition, to return us to the Middle Ages, looking rather pedestrian. We need more backward-looking people like Gove in the party and more people with completely unworkable ideas. Either that or we should all migrate to UKIP."

Tories Sharpen The Knives.

David Cameron has done his level best to please the Eurosceptic nutters in his party by offering an "in-out" referendum on British membership of the EU - well sort of. The Eurosceptics immediately showed their appreciation by stepping up their campaign to oust Cameron and replace him with an even bigger idiot. The choice, unfortunately, is narrowing. Only two senior Tories seem to have any chance of becoming the next Tory Prime Minister - Theresa May or Michael Gove. The only other big hitters in the party, the unelectable baldies David Hague and Ian Duncan Smith, have already had their go and fluffed it while George Osborne is too big a moron even for the Tories to contemplate. So, they are left with Theresa May who has managed to turn even the police against them or Michael Gove who is not taken seriously by anyone outside of Lalaland. So why are they so intent of getting rid of Cameron - surely their only real hope of winning the next election? In a word, the LibDems. They simply cannot forgive Cameron for failing to give them the majority they need to indulge all their nasty little fantasies and then taking them into coalition with the hated LibDems who they blame for putting a brake on them. Of course the truth is that it was the electorate who put the brake on them, but they don't care too much for democracy in any case. Their real choice for leader, given the chance, would be Nigel Farage but he's unavailable. So its a matter of burning Cameron at the stake and then hoping for the worst.

The First Casualty Of Toryism.

It was Aeschylus, the Greek tragic dramatist (525 BC - 456 BC), who is credited with first saying that "In war, truth is the first casualty." He was talking about propaganda, two thousand years before that term was coined, and its role as a necessary strategy during periods of conflict. After all, how else can a government persuade its people that it is right to set aside normal civilised standards and do terrible things to the enemy? When a government kranks up the propaganda machine, therefore, it is axiomatic that some enemy is about to suffer. This week a whole raft of stories show quite conclusively that the Tories are working overtime to do just that. Despite recent Treasury's claims that the British economy grew this year by 1% the reality is that it shrank by 0.1% and George Osborne was only able to claim otherwise by "manipulating" the figures. Meanwhile Ian Duncan Smith has been defending his "Work Experience" scheme which, he says, has been delivering outstanding results when the truth is that there has been no discernable improvement at all. Michael Gove, not to be outdone by IDS, has also been using some very dodgy statistics to "prove" that Britain had fallen from "4th to 16th place in science; from 7th to 25th place in literacy; and from 8th to 28th in maths" in the period between 2000 and 2009. The truth is that Michael Gove deliberately chose the year 2000 for comparison because he knew that statistics for that year are completely unreliable. Now the government has been rebuked by the UK Statistics Authority for claiming that spending on the NHS has increased over the last two and-a-half years when it is actually lower now than it was in 2010. Having promised to "cut the deficit and not the NHS" it is sobering to find that real spending on the NHS has declined while the national debt has increased by a staggering £150 billion. So who is the enemy at which all these dodgy statistics and propaganda are aimed? Having been told that we are nothing better than a bunch of work shy, bone idle scroungers the answer is us - you and me - the great British public. Comparisons have been made between David Cameron and Adolf Hitler but such claims cannot be taken seriously. Even Adolf Hitler had more sense than to fill every position in his government with a clone of Joseph Goebbels.

Gove Helps With The Unemployment Figures

Michael Gove, the obnoxious runt in the Tory litter, has taken the lead in reacting to the bad news about unemployment. Not only have the figures for those out of work gone down but the figures for those claiming unemployment benefits have gone up. This, as can be imagined, is a Tory nightmare as workers threaten to become slightly more confident while the cost of throwing people out of work goes up. The fact that the figures make absolutely no sense whatsoever is a secondary concern since nothing the Tories claim makes sense to anyone but them. Gove's solution is quite simple - reduce those working at the Ministry of No Education by 25% while making sure that the redundancies fall disproportionately on ethnic minorities, the disabled and those over 50. "My measures accord well with Tory principles," he told our reporter. "They will redress the imbalance of too many people having jobs causing them to become increasingly bolshie and threatening to expand the economy by creating extra demand. At the same time they will attack the causes of all that is wrong with Britain - filthy foreigners, useless crippled people and old farts who have not had enough sense to become government ministers. Coupled to my improvements in education - a greater emphasis on rote learning, privatised schools to fleece parents, universities that working class scum can't afford to go to and the King James' Bible to ensure mindless acceptance of my authority - we can all look forward to a new future in the 18th century."

Gove Flogs Cheap Land To His Rich Mates.

Michael Gove, universally recognised as the worst Education Secretary since the last Tory village idiot to have the job, has today admitted that he has inadvertantly been telling lies. Not only has he ignored advice from the School Playing Fields Advisory Panel when it suited his purposes, he has also been responsible for publishing "innacurate" figures. In BBC reports today, of course, great emphasis has been laid on the two examples where there appears to be good reasons for selling the land but the other 28 have been largely ignored while the "innacuracies" have hardly been mentioned. History teaches us why this is happening. Under the last Labour government, between 1997 and 2010, 226 school playing fields were sold while the government invariably went along with the findings of the School Playing Fields Advisory Panel. Under the previous Tory regime, between 1979 and 1997, 10,000 playing fields were sold. The Tories simply do not believe that ordinary children need or deserve playing fields and that only the playing fields of Eton should survive because, of course, it was there that the Battle of Waterloo was won. Unfortunately for the rest of us so was the Battle of Peterloo.