The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Sunday, 20 April 2014

Cameron Appointed Bankrupt To Run Public Finances.

David Cameron has come under increasing criticism today for reappointing a bankrupt as the head of the Public Works Loan Board charged with overseeing a budget of £60 billion in public funds. Although Tony Caplin was originally appointed by the previous Labour government he was confirmed in the job during 2012 within weeks of filing for bankruptcy. We asked a government spokesman how this could have happened; "Well, he is one of us isn't he? Obviously a man as important as Tony Caplin needs several hundred thousand pounds a year to live in the manner to which he's become accustomed. I should think that, being bankrupt, he probably needed the job, which might explain why he "mistakenly" forgot to tell us about it. But, let's face it, anyone can make a mistake - look at Maria Miller for instance, not to mention all the other MP's and public servants who are far too busy to make sure they're also honest." We asked if anyone in the government asked Mr.Caplin about his finances before confirming him in his position; "Certainly not! One does not ask a gentleman about his finances. Where did you grow up? On a council estate? I've never heard the like. What you people fail to appreciate is that important people like Mr.Caplin live by a different set of standards to the peasants, hoi polloi and plebeians. My God you'll be telling me next that we should pay taxes!"

1 comment:

  1. And while we concern ourselves with tittle tattle the world is being carved up by what can only be described as despotic psychopaths.

    It is neither a coincidence nor guesswork that the National Intelligence Council of the United States Government estimated that Nigeria will disintegrate by the year 2015. The whole report actually is a coded statement of intentions on how using destabilization plots the US plans to eventually dismember Nigeria.

    Related: NewsRescue- Nigeria Targeted For Destruction: Gordon Duff, US

    The whole goal of the destabilization campaign is to ensure that Nigeria is weakened internally by intractable crises leading up to 2015 when the next general elections are expected to come up. By that year there will be so much mutual suspicion among Nigerians that the elections itself might not hold or if they did at all will set the stage for a full rapture of the Nigerian state. By its calculation and design, the Nigerian state will be so fractious by then; it will be fully ripe for intervention and break up. It is in actualization of this plan that the US strategic planners on Nigeria have devised a three stage plan of implementation.

    Related: NewsRescue- US Army Prepares for Nigeria’s Possible Break-up (2015)

    Stage 1: Pakistanizing Nigeria

    With the scourge of Boko Haram as an existential reality, in the coming months the spate of bombings and attacks on public buildings are likely to escalate. High value symbolic targets like churches, mosques and large congregations of people of both faiths will be targeted.

    There will also be escalation in provocative statements and incitements by groups to violence. For good measure and effect, the bombings and attacks will be staged on days of observance of religious activities.

    The goal is to exacerbate tension and mutual suspicion among adherents of the two faiths in Nigeria and leading to sectarian violence.

    This pattern of destabilization operation is taken out of the Pakistani manual of destabilization where a sustained spate of CIA sponsored bombings and sectarian violence stretched the ability and resources of the law and order agencies to cope rendering the country weak and vulnerable to foreign intervention.

    Stage 2: Internationalizing the Crisis

    Having the set the stage for an intractable sectarian violence pitting Christians against Muslims and between the various disparate groups in the country, there will be calls from the United States, European Union and United Nations for a halt to the violence. A plethora of advocacy groups around the world will struggle for the photo opportunity to mouth concerns about the carnage and humanitarian catastrophe. They will try to make a great show of providing humanitarian aid. For effect, there will be carpet bombing coverage by the International media on the Nigerian crisis with so-called experts discussing all the ramifications who will strive to create the impression that only benevolent foreign intervention could resolve the crisis.

    There will be a deluge of international conferences at various capitals around the world all ostensibly aimed to save Nigerians from themselves. Meanwhile away from all the public flurry of activities, the US which initiated the crisis in the first place will be secretly drawing up plans to carve out Nigeria for its strategic and economic benefits.

    Stage 3: the Great Carve out under UN Mandate

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