The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Tuesday 15 September 2020

Why The UK Government Is Killing It's Own People.

We are used to the UK government killing people for money. They have no compunction in arranging the sale of arms to dodgy regimes bent on murdering people and taking backhanders from the arms industry. That's simply par for the course. They have now extended such nice little earners into the domestic sphere and are now killing UK citizens for money. When the Coronavirus pandemic began back in January 2020 they were content for us to "take it on the chin" and the idea of "herd immunity" was all the rage. When it was pointed out that, if only half the population contracted the disease and only 2% died, that would amount to a death rate of 600,000 they thought again. Some of those who died would be Tory voters it was realised. Worse yet those who died from such neglect might have relatives who voted Tory. That was a problem that needed urgent consideration. Scientists were consulted and it was clear that in order to avoid a collapse in the Tory vote next time around something would have to be done. Looking to other countries that were already in the grip of the pandemic they found that a lockdown of Britain would be needed to slow the spread of the virus and an efficient test and trace system would be needed to pinpoint hotspots. Afraid that their business donors would be very unhappy with a lockdown Boris and his mates in cabinet hesitated and the disease consequently took off like a rocket. Reluctantly they imposed a lockdown when it was already too late and looked around for a solution to the biggest problem they faced. How could they and their rich mates makes a profit out of this? The answer was twofold. With British healthworkers in dire need of PPE they handed billions of public funds to their rich mates who had no experience or expertise in this area and received, in return, a trickle of PPE much of which was utterly useless. So far so good. But what about test and trace? Embarrassingly the EU offered an already existing system free of charge but, of course, that would have meant showing up Brexit for the bloody stupid idea it is so that was out. The answer, as far as the Tories were concerned, was obvious. The UK would produce its own "world beating" test and trace system by the the already tried and tested system of throwing huge amounts of public money at private companies with no experience or expertise in this area either. Better yet they could disguise this act of wholesale malficience by labelling it the "NHS Test and Trace System". Not only would the Tories rich mates then rake it in they could blame the NHS when it all went tits up. Result! Having diverted billions of pounds of public money into the hands of their rich and ever-greedy mates all they had to do was wait for some of the money to come back to them in the form of "donations". A national disaster was now a win/win situation for the party beloved of Brexiteers and other morons. The looming second wave of the pandemic is proving to be a bit trickier however. Massaging the death figures has proven to be only partially successful since getting on for 50,000 deaths is still difficult to explain let alone the nearly 70,000 who have actually died from the disease. It is also difficult to hide from an ever-increasing number of the possibly infected that the test and trace system is a joke and they have more chance of winning the lottery than of getting a test within 100 miles of where they live. We are at a crossroads in this national disaster and the Tories are faced with a dilemma. How can they rip off the country for a second time and get away with it? Time for plan B. Let's break international law and divert attention back to Brexit, after all blming foreigners for something they haven't actually done has always worked in the past.

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