The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Friday, 24 June 2016

Etonian Idiot Makes Way For Etonian Buffoon.

While other Tory morons have been blaming the Labour party and Jeremy Corbyn for losing the EU referendum the real culprit, David Cameron, has just announced his intention to stand down as Prime Minister. This utter fool has not only divided the country almost neatly down the middle and laid the foundation for the disintegration of the UK, he has also managed to make his own position completely untenable. How did it come to this? Cameron called for this referendum in order to shut up the other boneheads in his own party and assure his position as head of the Tories. Now the boneheads have won and the bonehead-in-chief has lost his job. Nothing loath the Tory boneheads will now elect an even bigger bonehead to lead them - Boris Johnson. The Tory party cannot address the real problems that have led the British public to reject the EU because they are the problem. This referendum has turned out to be a vote against government - any government - rather than against the EU. The people unable to stop themselves from voting the worst possible people into power have now rejected the only people who stood between them and unfettered Toryism. Will £350 million a week now pour into the NHS? No, because we were not paying out £350 million per week to the EU and whatever we save from contributions to the EU the Tories will now pocket by rewarding themselves yet another tax cut. Will immigration now stop completely? No, it didn't in the 1950's and 60's before the UK joined the Common Market and it won't now. How else can the Tories punish us for having the nerve to exist and keep wages low without immigration? Will Brussels now stop telling us what to do? Yes, and now we can swop faceless bureaucrats there for faceless Tory donors here in Britain. Will the Tories now rip up the Convention of Human Rights? You bet your life they will and our human rights will now shrink until they disappear completely. The bonehead-in-chief has died, long live the next bonehead.

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