Iain Duncan Smith: The Smeagol Of British Politics.

Iain Duncan Smith, pictured above in characteristic pose, has been many things in his life - a benefit cheat, a liar, a failed leader of the Tory party and now a failed minister. This week his cherished policy of creating a single benefit designed to make it easier to force the unemployed, disabled and sick into complete destitution has crashed to the ground with a price tag of £425 million. The Parliamentary Accounts Committee has now issued a report that details the extent of his utter failure. The Department of Work and Pensions stands revealed as lacking in leadership, in which bad news and contrary evidence are routinely ignored and in which bullying is regarded as a legitimate management technique. This is hardly surprising since IDS himself has no leadership skills whatsoever, his only response to evidence proving him wrong is "I have a belief I am right," and who has demanded that MP's pin the failure of his policy on his permanent secretary, Robert Devereux. In many ways he bears a striking resemblance to Tolkien's creation Sméagol or Gollum as he is also called. A sneaky creature filled with resentment for his own failures, Sméagol is locked into a monomaniac search for his "precious" - the ring of power. IDS is similarly locked into a monomaniac search for power, jealously having to stand to one side as Cameron wields the power IDS feels should be his. Sméagol's catch phrases are tailor-made for IDS, "What's it got in it's pocketses?"; "We wants it. We needs it."; "You don't have any friends; nobody likes you"; "Come on Hobbits. Long ways to go yet. Smeagol will show the way"; "They do not see what lies ahead, when Sun has faded and Moon is dead". Uncanny isn't it?

IDS: "Everyone Is Pathetic Except Me."

The National Audit Office has damned Iain Duncan Smith's universal credit welfare scheme as suffering from "weak management, ineffective control and poor governance". They could, of course, have added "morally reprehensible" but instead confined themselves to noting that the whole debacle has cost the taxpayer £300 million so far and that IDS seemed to have no clear idea how his new scheme might work, or not as the case may be. IDS, having described himself as the "quiet man" of British politics, was anything but, blustering about ineffective Civil Servants deliberately sabotaging his plans and calling those asking questions about his inept performance "pathetic." Admitting that the IT meant to make his fantasy scheme work was "a write off" he then went on to claim that it would also "be delivered on time and budget". It has been clear for some time now that Iain Duncan Smith is at least one pork pie short of a picnic, that he entertains some strange ideas as to what constitutes "good" and "evil", is a scrounger of epic proportion and is so inept that only the Tory party would employ him. However, it now seems that he has some difficulty in understanding the English language when it suits him. Not to put too fine a point on it, IDS is nasty, inept and a liar of staggering brazenness. So far this week we've seen a Prime Minister, an Education Secretary and a Minister for Work and Pensions who have no grip whatsoever on the jobs they are supposed to do. No change there then.