The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Saturday, 12 November 2011

Tories Set To Pauperize Millions.


Ian Duncan Smith, pictured above sneering at poor people, has today announced plans to pauperize millions of British people in order to lessen the tax bill for himself and his mates. Tax credits and housing benefits will be withdrawn from people if he believes they are not working enough hours. We asked IDS for his comments; "I've been waiting for years to dismantle the welfare state and, as the coalition has made absolutely sure there will be no elections for at least another three years, now's my chance. I will have the peasants of this country begging for mercy in no time. I would like to take the opportunity on Rememberance Sunday to personally thank all those tossers who gave their lives in two world wars to present me with this chance. It is my intention to get revenge for all those years when democracy flourished, albeit briefly, in Britain. Democracy is over - get used to it."

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