As the Church of England swings behind protest against the Coalition's war against ordinary people, the government has decided to ban all protest during the Olympic games. We asked Seb Coe for his comments; "Its only right that all protest during the Games should be surpressed. If not, the government, who are not paying for the event, might be severely embarassed by those who are. We will tolerate no further dissent during the period when we are showcasing our democracy to the rest of the world. Resistence will be crushed in the interests of all those advertising during the events." Having spoken to the head of the Nazification of sport, we asked a leading LibDem for his comments; "This is all part of the reciprocal agreement between the Coalition partners. The Tories have agreed to ignore the Church and, in return, we have abandoned every principle we've ever had. Democracy is all very well when the Syrians, Egyptians and Libyans are dying for it, but we're too sophisticated for things like rights for ordinary people. If Jesus Christ was so interested in his fellow man why did he found a multi-billion pound religious industry? That's what the bishops should be thinking about." Confused our reporter next turned to the Church of England for their reaction; "It's a no-brainer to be honest. OK, we've spent the last 500 years flogging insurance policies to the superstitious who have no way to collect this side of the grave. However, if you have declared principles the problem is that sometimes you have to live up to them. Not that the LibDems understand that."
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