George Osborne, pictured above several months ago when he discovered that "Plan A" wasn't going to work, has finally picked up a book on economics and discovered John Maynard Keynes. Having attacked the British economy with all the glee of a serial killer released from Broadmoor on a one day pass, he as at last taken the first tentative steps to put right what he's been doing wrong for eighteen months. We asked a Tory insider for the party's reaction; "This was always our plan. We term it the, "only kidding" strategy. After threatening the country with complete economic meltdown we are now giving voters to good news so they'll be conned into voting for us again next time. Once we're safely in again - without the bloody LibDems - then we can really get to work at putting Britain back where it belongs - the 15th century."
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