The News In Shorts
How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.
Wednesday, 21 December 2011
Public Accounts Committee Labels HMRC As Tosspots.
The Public Accounts Committee has reported today that HMRC are incapable of collecting taxes from big business because they are incompetent. It accused them of giving "sweetheart deals" to the likes of Goldman Sachs and Vodaphone while, at the same time, hounding small businesses and self employed tradesmen. We asked the HMRC for their view; "We support those suckers who actually want to pay their taxes and the £25 billion or so that we failed to collect from big business is chicken feed compared to the £468 billion we've squeezed out of ordinary hard working people. You have to realise that we are, by and large, pretty useless at anything other than bullying small people." We asked the Public Accounts Committee for their reaction; "Most of the information we managed to get came from a whistle-blower. HMRC basically stonewalled us and, of course, the government weren't in the least bit interested. They're pretending that the deals with Goldman Sachs and Vodaphone were "mistakes." I don't know about you but I think that any organization that can manage to lose £25 billion must be making more than few "mistakes." If it walks like a corrupt duck and quacks like a corrupt duck, its a corrupt duck."
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