Argentina Tries New Tack To Steal Falklands.

Argentina has stepped up pressure on the Falkland Islands in order to bully the population there into submission. They have persuaded their trading partners in the South American equivalent of the EU, Mercosur, which includes Brazil, Argentina, Paraguay and Uruguay, not to allow ships flying the Falklands flag into their ports. We asked an Argentinian spokesperson why they want these barren lumps of rock in the South Atlantic; "It's a matter of national pride. We are big and Britain is little and should, therefore, do what we want. Britain stole the Malvinas even before Argentinia came into existence and we cannot tolerate this insult to our machismo. We also want access to potential oilfields in the area and on the adjacent area of Antartica. I must warn you now that, if we don't get our way, we will scream and scream until we are sick." We asked the Foreign Office for their reaction; "We beat the Argies once and, if they invade again, we will do it again. The Royal Navy, which now consists of three nuclear submarines and an Admiral's yacht, will be despatched to the area to shout "boo." Meanwhile our Army, which now consists of three men armed with the latest in shovels, can be quickly redeployed to the South Atlantic - if we can charter a boat to take them - and the RAf as alerted its aircraft, both of them, just in case."