The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Wednesday, 8 February 2012

How Lansley's "Reforms" Will Work.


There seems to be a lot of confusion as to how Andrew Lansley's newly "reformed" NHS will work. We asked our Health corresspondent for his view; "Private companies, many of them American, will be given access to GP's patients lists and their ailments. These companies will then trawl through the lists to identify those who have enough money to pay for their healthcare, phone them up and offer them the chance to jump the queue for treatment. They'll be able to do that because they will now have access to nearly 50% of the beds, doctors and nurses at local NHS hospitals. At the moment they can't expand their operations because there aren't enough private hospitals to take advantage of the demand. With Lansley's "reforms" they will be able to use medical resources that they haven't paid for and, therefore, be able to expand their businesses without any further investment. Instead the investment will be made by the tax payer. In other words the "reforms" are an expansion of the socialist utopia for business that bankers enjoy in which they shovel public money into their pockets come rain or shine and then refuse to pay their fair share of taxes while it's uncontrolled capitalism for the rest of us."

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